Day 212: Freedom!

17 June, 2010

There is always a stifling feeling when you live in the conservative society of a small town, like the one where I grew up in India. Especially if you are a girl, many things are taboo. What you wear, how you walk, how you talk - everything is scrutinized, literally. For example, am not talking about wearing bikinis and walking around. Even if girls wear something that reveals their calves alone, the so-called society would be appalled. If they speak loudly, that's bad. If they have an opinion, that's bad. If they play a game running around with their friends, that's bad as well. In short, one is always thinking how best to "behave" in every situation and you are practicallyy living for someone else and not for yourself. Am not saying it is the same in every part of India, but that's how it was in my place and I used to hate it.

And that was one of the reasons why I felt a relieving sense of freedom when I first came to Singapore. I used to and still love the fact that none really cares what I wear or what I do here. I can be myself without having to put up a front or being continuously judged. No one here tells me "You can't do that because you are girl." Even if someone does, I can easily ask that person to go bury himself/herself and none would be bothered too.

This is also why people like my mom and mom-in-law become so happening when they are here (or even when they are in Phuket for that matter). Because they get to do whatever they want! Wear swim suits and go the beach, wear huge sunglasses and stroll in the streets, wear trousers and capris and skirts and short-sleeved blouses and all those things that they had always wanted to wear, go out at night on their own without any fear, have that rare drink, etc. And I love to see them doing all these things because I know just how good that feels! To spend a few days without any inhibitions really feels like getting out of a cage.

And today, I was very happy to see a sight from the bus I was taking to work. An Indian aunty in sari was in a play area of a HDB compound. And she was... well.... on the see-saw! What was so beautiful about the sight was that she looked as if she was on top of the world as she was bouncing up and down on the see-saw in her full Indian housewife paraphernalia. Am pretty sure this is one of her first few visits to Singapore and she has not let go of her full-time sari-wearing habit yet. And am also pretty sure that she, in her wildest dreams, wouldn't have imagined that she would be on a see-saw at this stage of her life. I didn't notice who the good soul was on the other side of the see-saw because she captured my attention fully.

And as I saw her perched on the edge of the see-saw, holding on to the bar with all her strength, sari carefully tucked beneath her legs without even an inch straying off, and her face a picture of pure abandoned glee, I couldn't help but smile. She was tasting the joy of not caring a hoot for what the world thinks. That would be a rare, special moment for her!

And it made me so delighted in an inexplicable way. Welcome to the club aunty, whoever you are!

788 more to go.